Kissmas Eve

Christmas is all about tradition in my family, the biggest one being the Christmas Eve party that we have at my mom's house every year. Everyone comes over for dinner, nertz, a treasure hunt, Jesus cake, and my mom always throws in some sort of churchy movie.

When we were kids, my parents would set up a treasure hunt with clues hidden around the house, the last clue leading to where our Christmas Eve presents were hidden. And every year, those presents would be pajamas accompanied by a night cap (not that kind of night cap) hand made by my mom.

Now that we're all growd up, it's the grandkids that get to do the treasure hunt, and because neither of them can read, my mom just attached a string to the presents and gave them the end so they could follow it to their treasure.




And yes, they got hats too.






Brolan wasn't a fan of his.




It was just riveting to watch!








Bob (mom's man) was the most excited about it.




And now for the spiritual moment of the night, the churchy Christmas video. Can you tell how touched everyone is? I was definitely crying behind the camera, I'm surprised this picture is actually in focus.




Everyone loves mom's spiritual moments. And what better to follow such spiritualness other than a fowl-mouthed game of nertz?!




See that chick second in from the left? You know, the one sitting next to my dad? She was crowned the Nertz Queen in 1993 and still holds that title to this day.




As you see, Albert is not playing. He refuses to play nertz with me. I don't know why the hell not, the first time we played all I did was swear at him, hit him, and threaten his life. I don't see the problem.




So Alyse was my partner, and I'm pretty sure I only yelled at her once. Not sure how many times I swore during the game but it doesn't matter because when we play nertz, the non-swearing rule goes out the window and we're allowed to say whatever is needed in order to win.

Shit. Damn. Hell.

That's about the extent of my family's swears. However this time I may have called someone a bastard, but I can't be sure.

Oh, and can you guess who won?




No, not Al, ME! Yep, I'm still the queen, but that was no surprise to anyone. If any of you out there want to challenge my current title, then by all means, it is so on. I'll kick your trash.


Moving on...it's time for Jesus cake!





For your information, that gaping hole in the side of the cake was not from me. I definitely did not sneak a couple bites before it was time to serve the cake, and if I did, it was definitely not to get back at everyone for wanting to wait until AFTER we played nertz to eat the cake. Don't mess with my cake bitches!




Logan helped blow out the candles on Jesus' birthday cake. I'm pretty sure Jesus is probably 2007 years older than 3 but we didn't have any more candles, plus my mom didn't want to start her house on fire so we just stuck with the 3. I'm sure Jesus didn't mind.


Here's Chad, Kels & Brolan waiting patiently for cake.





Sorry Karn Katherine, it looks like Brolan is already groping girls, I'll try to straighten him out for Cutie Pie! (I'm 99.99% sure that it is my brother's fault)

Lindee loves it when I take her picture. She begged me to take this and I was like "fine, whatever".




Other cute pics...Mom and her dude.




And of course, my cute dad.




Okay so you all know I'm constantly on the quest of becoming the favorite aunt right? Well I'm pretty sure I've achieved that with Logan but I'm still working on Brolan. So that night I was devastated to watch this phenomenon occur.

Brolan wanted Alex.




The baby wanted to play with the big scary dude. And not only that but he wanted to feed him.




Over and over.




And when it was done? Then guess what happened.




Yes, Brolan gave Alex a kiss! I couldn't handle the betrayal, Christmas is supposed to be filled with love and peace, not hatred and jealousy.




I better step up my game.





Ok if you all can keep a secret, then I'll show you some top secret pictures. Logan and I may or may not have snuck away during the spiritual moment to work on our face making abilities.


Happy Face.




Sad face.




Cute Face.




Surprised Face.




Angry Face.




Scared Face.




Silly Face.





And finally,



Pissed Face.



Don't mess with us.

Ochoversary

Happy 8th Anniversary Albert!

Eight reasons Why I love Alex:

1. Because he always makes me laugh (But I'm still the funny one).

2. Because he loves me even though I'm the most awkward human being in the world.

3. Because he has the cutest "sad boy" face I've ever seen.

4. Because he always takes care of me when I'm sick.

5. Because he always gives me the best advice.

6. Because he has always been my rock (Not just his muscles).

7. Because he listens to me and is NEVER afraid to admit when he is wrong.

8. Because everything he does, he does for our little family and our future.

9. Because he has the best laugh ever.

10. Because he makes up songs and sings them to me daily.

11. Because I love the "Casual Friday" song he sings to me every Friday morning.

12. Because he can always be himself around me and he shows me a side of him that nobody else can see.

13. Because I know that I can tell him anything.

(Couldn't keep it at eight, sorry)

First Day we met (in person):

At our wedding dinner:

I actually proposed to him. Ok, not really.

Christmas Eve 2009

I love you Bert!

Aloha! (It Means Hello And Good Bye, You Guess Which One I Meant)

Back to the wonderful world of sun, warmth and crazy weed dudes, we find ourselves snorkeling in Molokini.

Molokini is a crater out in the middle of a channel away from the sand so it's a tropical underwater oasis and blah blah blah which means it's an amazing place for snorkeling! The water is clear and blue and the fish swim right up next to you.

Now I went snorkeling in Cancun but that was nothing like Hawaii, sure in Cancun we saw a couple sting rays and the water was clear but there was nothing else to see. The crater was just full of colorful plants and fish everywhere and yes, sharks!

I saw two sharks, mind you they stayed at the bottom of the crater and didn't come near us, at least didn't come near me, and they weren't the "jaws" type of sharks, they were smaller but definitely frightening.



Of course not frightening to me because I knew I could totally take that shark if by chance an attack was underway. I've got an unforgiving uppercut and the ultimate scuz face that would stop any shark dead in it's tracks.

So I wasn't worried and I followed the shark until I couldn't keep up with him anymore, or until I ran into a fellow snorkeler. Seriously, it's amazing to snorkel there but in that small of space with a million other snorkelers it's kind of hard to find a remote area.

We then were fortunate enough to snorkel with sea turtles. They are huge and they are beautiful. And those suckers are fast! We had underwater cameras and Clay took a bunch of pictures but I haven't seen them yet, so I'm sorry I have no turtle pictures for you.


Get over it.


I did however, get a few pictures of us on the boat before they threw us into the middle of the cold deep ocean. With no life jackets.






If you didn't notice, Albert is absent from these photos. He actually opted out of the snorkeling adventure due to the cuts he received on his feet from snorkeling the day before. He could hardly walk. He still has scabs.

Ouch.


Okay are you ready for the cutest picture of the year? Probably the cutest picture ever?

























We all couldn't help but laugh when we saw that Ava thought she was going snorkeling too, she was already to go!



Later in the week we found ourselves enjoying a sunset dinner cruise on the Spirit of Lahaina.



Before dinner they had a little magic show and my two cutie nephews got to be part of it. He had each of them hold a rope tight while he stood in front of it and then you'll never guess what he did, he pulled that rope right through his body and it appeared in front of him!



Seconds after I took this picture the top half of the magicians body fell to the floor and blood started spewing out from where his torso was once attached spraying blood on the whole audience. He was pronounced dead at the scene.


Guess he wasn't that great of a magician after all.


Ok, that part didn't really happen but you all are wishin it had, you sickos.



Ta-da!


Not only was this dude magical, but he could take pictures too.



Amazing.









Back at our Hawaiin abode, Al would work out every single day. Seriously, doesn't he know what the word vacation means?




Apparently not.

But the kids wanted to work out too. They were hilarious!





The following pictures are brought to you by Cris when the guys went boogie boarding, I'm so sad I missed out on this!








Okay, so my cute, innocent sister in law Sharon thought it would be a great idea to make a sand sculpture of a nice big pair of boobs. I know, I couldn't believe it either.




Okay, so she wasn't sculpting boobs, on purpose anyway. She was trying to make Mickey Mouse, but she told me while she was doing it she looked down and realized it looked like boobs, and everyone was giving her the WTF look. It's funny because that is SO unlike Sharon, I love her.

We also went to the aquarium and saw lots of cool sea creatures. Here I am taking a picture with the scariest sea creature on display.



Don't be frightened, I used my shark uppercut and survived the encounter.





I love this picture, can you see the reflection of a certain someone?













This seems to be a popular form of transportation for Ava.







And finally, the moment you've all been waiting for. Don't be frightened, I heard that Hawaii officials were able to taze this creature and had it contained before it could pray for undeserving people.


Ladies and gentlemen, the 5 foot 10 inch Praying Mantis!