A Child Was Born, The World Rejoiced, And There Was Peace Throughout The Land

Date: July 3, 1981
Time: 11:45 PM
Event: A glorious human being was brought into this world



Date: July 4, 1981
Time: 10:00 PM
Event: The world celebrated with fire in the sky


And you thought it was to celebrate independence, shows what you know.


Date: July 3, 2009
Time: 4:30 PM


She wanted cupcakes.

She got cupcakes.

And she was happy.

She wanted Armenian Yogurt Soup.

She got Armenian Yogurt Soup.

And she was happy.

She wanted chocolate cake.

She got chocolate cake.

And she was happy.

And there was peace throughout the land.



Yes, it's a tale as old as time. Well, 28 years old at least. And if you haven't guessed, that NOT SO glorious human being is me and I am now 28 years old.


10 things I've accomplished in my 28 years

1. Ate dog food at the age of 4 thanks to a sweet older brother.
2. Eaten 10,331.5 bowls of cold cereal.
3. Had a bird poop on my head.
4. Participated in 14 piano recitals.
5. Dressed up as a cactus 2 times.
6. Kissed __ boys and __ girls.
7. Fallen in love.
8. Participated in 9 ballet recitals, 2 Nutcracker ballets, 12 high school drill team competitions, 2 college drill team competitions, and 4 solo competitions.
9. Laughed so hard that my dairy queen milkshake squirted out my nose.
10. Been a pizza maker, a waitress, a telemarketer, an at home data entry employee, a customer service rep, a money market operator, a student, an accountant, and a wife.

You Can Learn A Lot From TV

I was trying to keep my eyes open Friday night while lying on Andrea's couch when a comedian on TV caught my interest. We had just eaten dinner at Mikados and returned to Kevin & Andrea's house for some action packed card games, which didn't actually happen because Andrea fell asleep.

Okay, okay, it was me alright? I fell asleep. I ruined the evening okay? Don't act like you're surprised.

But back to the comedian. Before I dozed off this comedian went into a bit about his relationship with his wife and married couples in general. It seems that women are constantly battling to get their husbands to help out more around the house.


Um, duh!


He relayed a story about when he was a bachelor sharing an apartment with his roommates and how much easier it was to get them to clean. All he had to do was walk into the living room while his roommate was watching TV and say:


"Hey Dick! Do the the dishes!"


The roommate would say "Hey, who ya callin a dick?" on his way to the kitchen and guess what? He would do the dishes every time. So the comedian suggested that this is the way wives need to get their husbands to do the dishes, instead of whining and yelling and talking about it over and over.





Fast forward to Saturday morning

I'm making the bed when I look over at the mountain of Al's stuff that has accumulated on our dresser. He uses the dresser as his "catch all" space and it has been slowly driving me insane. I cringe at the site of all his receipts, paper, books, coins, golf tees, used condoms, and hats.


I'm kidding people, there are no books, why would Al have any books?


So Al gets home from golfing and thinks that he is going to start playing video games. Ya know, like ya do after golfing.


Golfing is hard.

I am now in the kitchen thinking, no way in hell is he gonna sit and play video games when there is a dresser sitting there taunting me with it's filthiness! So I casually stroll past the bedroom and say,


"Hey Dick! Clean off the dresser!"


And then I continue on my way. Minutes later, the dresser is spotless.

The Sneaky Bastard Strikes Again

Damn Cat.

Don't Be Scared

Changes are coming to my blog so don't be scared.


Just know that I still love you and you are in the right place. And don't worry, change is good, you will no longer have to look at my hubster's HUGE forehead.


Al, you can thank the girls at Blogalicious Designs for that.

Man Card? What Man Card?

The second day of our vacation is what I like to call "Bad Ass Biker Babes Day". We rolled out of bed, put on our mean Harley gear, and left for an all day long Harley ride.

We road into what the Californians like to call "mountains" but in reality they were just hills, or little bumps if you will. (Come on, I live in UTAH!)

First stop was Hell's Kitchen where the service is awful, the food is mediocre and the testosterone level is off the charts.










I always knew I'd go to Hell, I just didn't know it would be so soon.






After breakfast we wanted to go riding by the beach so we had to take the freeway to get there. Unfortunately the freeway looked like this:




Before we got on the freeway, Lyman (Dennelle's fiance) asked Alex if he was okay with "white lining". Not being able to hear over the roar of the engines, Alex thought Lyman asked if he was okay with "sharing lanes" to which he replied "YES".

When we entered the freeway all was well until Lyman started driving on the white line in between cars.




Apparently this is common in California but I had never seen it before. As I sat on the back of the bike I watched the mirrors on our motorcycle pass inches away from the mirrors on the cars. This is about the point when I started to freak out. We were going pretty fast and the cars were at a slow steady roll and drivers would change lanes out of no where in front of us.

My jaw was locked, my body went stiff and I knew that if I was going to make it through this I would have to shut my eyes. So that's what I did, the whole freeway trip I was wincing, keeping my eyes closed, my jaw shut and my body stiff.


Yep, I was that constipated chick on the back of the bike.


The freeway ride from hell seemed to last for an eternity but we finally arrived at the beach in one piece. Lyman said Alex did a great job white lining, I wouldn't have known, I was just trying not to pee my pants. Once at the beach I was finally able to breathe and relax.


But my jaw is still sore.


We rode ALL DAY LONG.


Wait, I don't think you get it, I mean we rode ALL. DAY. LONG. on a rental with a standard seat. Not the comfy cushy seat that our bike at home has, this one was like sitting on a burning slate of steal and I swear to you that to this day my butt still hasn't forgiven me, possibly never will.


In the morning we were able to ride through the wine country on our way to return the rental. Don't be fooled by my smile and helmet hair, my butt was killing me and threatening to disown me.




Now don't be afraid of this next picture, just don't pay attention to the bulging veins on my forehead. They show up often and are shaped in a Y, which I think is one of the reasons my mom decided to end my name with a Y instead of an I. I'm sure of it.




After dropping off the bike we were able to get in two more wineries before we had to fly home. The first one was really fun, not the best wine, but fun none the less.

Wilson Creek Winery & Vineyards




It was really fun inside and beautiful outside.








The last winery was Leonesse Cellars which had fantastic wines!




One of Dennelle's friends was able to make it out with us. I'm not even going to comment about the tall monster in the middle, I don't like to focus on such things, besides I was crouching down anyway.






I love this picture of Lyman.



"Mmmmmm, crackers!"





So that's about it, after that we headed to the airport to catch our flight back to Utah. Lyman and Alex had become such good friends during the trip that they both cried a little after saying goodbye with a man hug. They'll both deny it but Dennelle and I know the truth.


They both got a punch out of their man card for that one.