Thursday, February 25, 2010

Observations From A Candy Dish

Is anyone else in love with these?

I'm truly amazed that I am not grossed out by the fact that eating one of these simulates eating a raw egg.



Check out the insides, there's yellow yolk and everything.







I mean, that's a future baby chick folks. You're eating a future baby chick! How does that not gross people out?



I don't know why but I love them, especially when the insides are extra runny. The more it resembles a real egg, the better. Why is that NOT disturbing to me?



Oh, and don't get me started on these:







These are TO. DIE. FOR.



I like to keep a little candy dish on top of my desk at work. I try to change my candy bowl to match each season of the year so right now, being the season of Easter Bunnies & eggs, I have a darling pink Easter basket full of pastel colored candy.







And as a bonus I have to have a small bowl of the mini cadburry eggs on my desk at all times.







This is the only way I can get people to come visit me. You see, I like to pretend I'm popular, but really everyone knows the only reason I get visitors is because of my candy dish. It's actually pretty funny how people feel like they need an excuse to come into my office when their sole purpose is to satisfy their nagging sweet tooth.



"Um hey, so, uh...doooo you know where Matt is?" A coworker stammers, making the words up on the spot.



"Why no, I don't know where Matt is but hey! While you're here, why don't you have some candy?" I reply, not taking my eyes off of my computer screen.



"Well, since you asked..." He grins as he partakes.



Dude, why would I know where Matt is? Wait, who the hell is Matt? Does a Matt even work here?



And then there's the people that come and steal handfuls of candy at a time and say the same joke every time they do so.



"You are in so much trouble. Darnit, you're doin it again, you're just trying to make us all fat!" A coworker says while filling his pockets with chocolate.



"Ha ha ha. Yep, you got me. That's my evil plan." I reply. For the hundredth time.



And then there's the big boss dude. You know, the boss of your bosses boss? He comes to browse through my selection but never takes anything. For the life of me I can't figure out what kind of candy this man likes! My ultimate goal is to please him.



Seriously, every time I buy candy I stand in the grocery isle staring at the array of bright colored bags of sugar thinking...hmmmm...what would big boss dude like?



I have yet to figure this out and every time I ask him what he would prefer, all he says is "Oh I like anything!"



No. Obviously you don't, because you never take anything. Come on big boss dude, I feel like a failure here!



Oh, and if I am absent for a day from work?



Forget about it.



The candy is gone when I come back the next day. It's amazing how fast the candy can go when there's nobody in the office to notice that you've already taken 10 handfuls.



It just makes me laugh. I really don't care how much candy you take, that's what the candy is there for! Oh people, they always feel like they need to justify themselves.



And then there's me.



I make absolutely sure that nobody is anywhere near the proximity of my office before I snag a piece of candy FROM MY OWN STASH.



44 comments:

Rebecca Jo said...

Your candy is all gone because your big boss man comes at night when everyones gone & he's chowing it up... he's playing it off.. that's what he's doing - scoping it out for the return KILl at night! :)

Oh my gosh - Cadbury Eggs are the reason for my existence... truly! I'll suck that fake baby chick out of that chocolate ANYDAY! :)

koopermom said...

Mini Eggs!!!


Glorious, heavenly, delicious mini eggs. I might have to go find some on my lunch break.

There goes the weight loss for the week..

Pricilla said...

I like those "raw" eggs too...

Aleta said...

Ok, the first egg, the one that looks like an egg inside - nooooo... sorry, that's kind of nasty. Lol.

But the mini eggs - OMG, I want some!

Tremayne and Dellany Higby said...

I can actually hear you getting fatter. hahaha What an ass I am.

Mandy said...

reading this makes me wish i did not give up candy for lent. thanks. ;)

Sara said...

I love the fact that you put candy on your desk.

I once put one of those big things of bottled water on my fridge and within a week it was gone. I didn't drink one bottle. Pretty sure the minute I said "I expensed these." My coworkers thought that meant "Sara bought these for us."

Brian Miller said...

i would be visiting quite often...

Heather@WHMB said...

Hahaha, you crack me up. Our comptroller at our office is the candy lady, what is it with you women, numbers, and CANDY. :) I love her for the chocolate fix I get every afternoon.

Kristina P. said...

You need to put out the cheap crap!

Rachel said...

For some reason I am thinking that your big boss dude is a Werther's Original kind of dude. I don't know why that popped into my head while I was desperately thinking of ways to please his sweet tooth. And why do I care? I have no idea.

And that Cadburry (sp?) Egg about made me throw up. That is just wrong and gross!

AmyLK said...

give me chocolate and I'm in!

Denise @ Sunflowers, Chocolate and Little Boys said...

Cadbury Cream Eggs and Mini Eggs are my two favorite candies. I wait patiently all year for Easter displays. Mmmmmmmmm.

Amy said...

I loooove the mini eggs, so good. Hey have you seen this?
http://www.ourbestbites.com/2009/04/cadbury-egg-cookies.html

I want to try them, they look evil.

Hernandez Family said...

A "little" candy dish? That thing is a big basket! I love candy dishes. I would have to visit your desk often just to say hi if we worked together.

We need to work together!

Donnetta said...

No Cadbury eggs for me, but do NOT get in between me and my Peeps!

WhisperingWriter said...

I LOVE Cadbury Cream Eggs. I've lost count on how many I've consumed so far. I think like...eight? Maybe more. They are just too good.

Tara said...

I am not lying when I say that I have already gone through three bags of the hard shelled eggs. I am such a fat addict!

dani said...

mmm. easter candy is the best. I might just stop by your desk one day...

Christine Macdonald said...

Sugar trumps Gross. Every time.

Margaret said...

I love the mini eggs!!!!!!!!!!!

Amy said...

I am glad you are making the cookies, let me know how they turn out, too bad I am dieting or I would make some :-( So enjoy an extra one for me (or two or three)

Jenna said...

Hmmm...me thinks that the big boss dude is checking to see if you're there, and when he does come in he is checking out your stash. When you've run to the restroom or are out of the office, he's probably the candy stealer. Just a hunch! ;)

KK said...

I. Love. It. Here! I feel so comfortable I took off my shoes and put my feet on the coffee table!

Justine said...

Aha! Now we know the TRUE reason for your muffin top and it has nothing to do with those bi-monthly cooking classes! You piggy!!!

And try Reese's peanut butter cups for the boss's boss. EVERYONE loves those.

Justine :o )

Momma@Live. Laugh. Pull your hair out said...

The cream eggs and mini eggs are my favourite...but I am on a diet.........

Maybe Easter will be a reason for me to have one or two.....

Wifey said...

The raw egg candies rock! Big boss dude is missin' out.

Winks & Smiles,
Wifey

Suzi said...

Cadburry is the BEST! I can't buy them, if I did I would weigh 300 lbs.

Sal B said...

LOL!! This made me laugh - thanks!

When I saw the pics of the Cadbury eggs, I was like - no way...those are one of my most favorite Easter candies ever!

Scrolling down....

No freakin way!!! The mini eggs are my FAVORITE Easter candy!!

Love it when I find someone else who totally pigs out on chocolate eggs.

Stacy (the Random Cool Chick) said...

You love all my favorite things, too. I'd be hanging out in your office all the time. I'd never leave. Because I'd expand so much I wouldn't be able to leave. ;)

I'm with Rebecca Jo - the bosses boss swipes them only when you're not around. ;)

Jeanne said...

Pooba,

Haha! I LOVE Cadbury mini eggs. There is a bag of them sitting next to me right now because as soon as they come out every year, Hubby buys them right away. :)

I used to like the big eggs when I was younger but at some point they (a) grossed me out to look at and (b) started tasting too rich and sickish for me.

Mini eggs can't be beat, though. Unless you've ever had Crispy Crunch candy bars from Canada. I believe they used to be Cadbury but now they are something like Neilson?? Those candy bars are awesome. Every trip to Canada must include some.

Of course, now that it's a zillion dollars (I'm exaggerating but you get the idea) to purchase a passport, it may be awhile before I make it to Canada again.

Jeanne

Julie said...

Ok... just looking at the pictures provides serious food porn! :) I love, love, love both the regular cadbury egg's and those mini ones. I can totally understand why the candy dish went empty!

And I totally agree about having your own stash. Yum.

Stopping by from SITS.

CLUFF FAMILY said...

Nope that is actually one chocolate candy I can pass up. Believe it or not. You are so nice to share!

Chief said...

this is why I cant eat the cadbury's

but I love the malted ones...

Marissa said...

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm...mini eggs.... LOVE them! They're especially good when you put them in the fridge and chill them!

Life with Kaishon said...

Sadly, I could eat an entire bag of those mini eggs.

In ten minutes.

Nana said...

Rebecca Jo hit the nail on the head. Big Boss Dude is filling his pants while you are gone. (Hmmmm, I know you know I mean with candy. Although I bet at your office anything goes. That doesn't sound right either.)

St. Jeor Family said...

So, mini eggs are the devil!! (I love them so much and once I have one, I just can't stop!) And cream eggs? The same! It's a good thing that I don't work in your office cause I would be in there several times a day and gain 10 pounds in a week!

Laura said...

Basically this post confirms why I should be at home with my kids. Uncontrolled candy is not part of my agenda. Now toast and iced coffee? Hells Yeah!

survivinglifedaily said...

We have a lady at our office that does the same thing, only when shes not here her office is locked...and shes rarely here! I love those mini-eggs, I have to get some soon!

Julia said...

I totally thought I left a comment on this one but obviously the kids must have distracted me... But I must admit the cadberry eggs scare me. Enough said.

The Cadberry MINI EGGS ARE MADE BY THE DEVIL! Seriously. THEY ARE TORTURE IN PASTEL!!

I love them. *sigh*

Megan said...

LOVE Cadbury Creme Eggs!!!! L-O-V-E!!!

People are hilarious. Love all the excuses but I think the jokes would get old. :0P

Alexis AKA MOM said...

See I couldn't have them on my desk I would eat it all! I would be the sly one that came by when you're gone because god help me if you knew how much of the candy I actually would it .. lol

LadyStyx said...

Candy desires are always a seasonal thing for me. Easter is those Mini Eggs that you mentioned and of course the requisite chocolate bunny. Valentines Day is the Russell Stovers Chocolate Truffles. Autumm hits and Im all about the candy corn while winter brings on the peppermint canes cravings. I do not crave these items at any other time of year.