So let's talk douche bags. It wasn't too long ago when I thought douche was pronounced dew-shay instead of doosh.
A dew-shay bag, if you will.
I don't remember where I had read about a douche bag, but in my head I was pronouncing it dew-shay.
Because I'm awesome like that.
So....one fine evening Alex and I went out to eat with a bunch of friends and someone called someone else a douche bag. Of course, being the mature adults we were, everyone busted up laughing. During the laughter I thought to myself, what is a douche bag anyway? And of course, since I never think before I speak, I blurted the question out loud to the group.
"What is a douche bag anyway?"
And of course, that made the group laugh even louder. Because, well, we are mature adults.
"You don't know what a douche bag is?"
"Um. No?" I immediately regretted opening my mouth and I started scolding myself in my head. Bad Pooba! Bad! No soup for you!
And so someone finally took pity on me and explained, right there at the restaurant mind you, exactly what a douche bag was. After I heard this, something clicked in my head and before I could stop my mouth, I said:
"Oh! You mean a dew-shay bag!"
That's when everyone got quite and stared at me with confused faces.
"Yeah, that's a dew-shay bag right?" I said again.
More blank stares. And then something clicked again in my head and I said:
"It's pronounced doosh isn't it? Doosh and dew-shay are one and the same aren't they?......I'm retarded."
And boy did everyone have a good laugh over that one. Will someone please teach me how to think before I speak?
1 year ago