I Left My Handcart At Home

You wanna get some good exersize? Go to Vegas with Dear Albert. I guess I first need to clear up some confusion that I have caused about my hubster's name. I refer to him as many different things:



Hubster
Alex
Al
Albert
Bert
Mother Effer



Ok, I just threw that last one in there for fun, I actually call him Father Effer, I'm not THAT mean people! So there you have it now you know all those names are referring to the same person. Now back to the Vegas exersize.


Saturday May 16th 2009
The following events take place between 11:00 am and 4:00 pm

1. At the Caesar's Palace Forum shops, Albert buys pants for his sexy booty.

2. Albert buys a drink for his thirsty throat.

3. We catch a cab over to The Coca-Cola Factory

See these two? They are the very proud parents of my husband Al and his brother Brandon. (Clay is their son too but he didn't go Vegas)




Alex and his brother have a very special relationship, they love each other so much. They even have pet names for each other, every time I hear Alex calling Brandon on the phone, I hear "Biiiiiiiiiiiitch!" in a loud high pitched voice. That's how I know he's talking to Brandon. Isn't that the sweetest?




So Brandon thought it'd be hilarious to make his mean older brother drink hairspray. He challenged Al to taste the coke products around the world and if he drank the one that tasted like hairspray, Brandon agreed he'd pay for the tasting.





Most of them weren't bad at all, until Mr. Hairspray showed up.












But he finished it! (With a little help!)












4. Then we moseyed on over to the M&M store. Trying to get the guys to pose for a picture was like pulling teeth! That's why I am so grateful for Cris who posed whenever I demanded it of her. (never mind my death threats)










And of course we had to buy bags of M&Ms from the M&M wall!! My favorite?




Peanut Butter!






I fell in love and totally felt up Mr. Red M&M guy. You see that look on Albert's face? Total jealousy. I pretty much had to separate the two from fighting over me. Geez I hate it when two guys fight over me, talk about embarrassing!




5. After we walked out of the M&M store into the 102 degree Las Vegas weather, Alex realized he didn't have his sunglasses. And of course these aren't just any sunglasses, they are his Versace sunglasses.




When it comes to fashion I think Alex was meant to be a girl and I the boy. I hate shopping and try to find the cheapest crap I can get while Al buys all the name brand nicest shit he can. (Ok, in most instances it's because they are the only clothes that fit him, but still!) The sunglasses I was wearing cost me 10 bucks so I bet his Versace glasses had to be like 15 or 20 bucks at least! :o)




(If you can't tell, Al and I are both trying to grab some booby in the above pic)

So after he said something like "bleeper bleepin sunglasses bleep bleep bleeper!" He had basically given up on ever finding the damn, oops, I mean bleepin sunglasses again. But you know what we did? We walked and walked and walked in the 102 degree weather back to Caesar's Palace Forum Shops. Let's just say we all didn't feel guilty about eating our M&Ms after that.




When we finally made it into the shops we were all drenched in sweat and about 30 pounds lighter, except for cute Sharon, I think she would disappear if she lost 30 pounds! So we went to check the store where Al bought his pants which was like 10 miles away on the other side of the shops.

Those shop hallways remind me of intestines, they are all cramped in there like a little maze and if you could stretch them out they would go on forever! Do you feel sorry for us yet?


So after walking for what it seemed like 5 hours, we reached the shop. Did we find some sunglasses there?

Yes.

Were they Albert's sunglasses?

No.

Luckily, as an after thought, we checked the little drink stand where Al bought a drink after he bought his pants and guess what? They had his sunglasses.




And all is well with the world once again! See Al? Don't just give up on a $200 pair of sunglasses are you kidding me? You fight for those suckers!


Lesson learned.


But I don't think our feet have quite recovered.