Friday, August 21, 2009

Marsha, Marsha, Marsha!


As many of you know I'm an accountant for a Gold Mining Company.


I love my job.


My boss is extremely laid back and lets me do my work without standing over my shoulder watching everything I do (which is what my old boss did). I even got two promotions from Staff Accountant to Consolidation Analyst to Senior Accountant. Usually an accountant either has to have a master's degree to become a Senior Accountant or has to be with the company for 5 years.


I only have a bachelors degree and I have only been with the company 4 years, but I was still promoted to a Senior Accountant. Now I'm not trying to brag here, I just need to lay out the background for you before I tell you that I had nothing to do with these promotions.


How did I get promoted? The only explanation I can think of is my husband. Every big wig at my work absolutely loves my husband. He goes golfing with them all the time and they enjoy their male bonding time drinking beer on the golf course.


I don't blame them, my husband is a charmer and seems to get along with just about anybody. Or at least he can fake it pretty well.



Now I suck at golf. I'm lucky if I can hit the ball in one swing so I definitely can't go golfing with the guys every Friday. Of course the fact that I don't have a penis is a big factor too. So I'm not the one out there networking and "getting in good" with the big wigs, it's my husband.


The one with the penis.


So it's fine with me that everyone likes him, but hey, I'M the one that does all the work, but he's the one who gets all the benefits. What's up with that?


Well, every year my company has a golf tournament at The Homestead Resort. Everyone in the office looks forward to this event and for months afterward, the tournament is still the topic of conversation.



It's a big deal with tons of swag given to us before we play, and dinner afterwards with a raffle that has really great prizes. And of course prizes for the winners of the tournament.


Now I don't golf but I do at this tournament, it's pretty much the one time a year I golf. The tournament is a scramble so luckily I don't have to be good because we take the best ball each time and with my husband on the team, I'm pretty safe.


When we arrived everyone was like "Hey Alex! How are you? Who is this person you brought with you?" Um, hello, it's me the one who actually works for you! Of course they are just kidding but still, you get the picture. HE'S the one they want to see.



This year we were paired up with a fellow accountant and his brother who are both great golfers!



We didn't win, but we did tie for second place coming in 7 under! And of course I had nothing to do with that score.



At one point the golf course got backed up. When I say backed up, I mean worse then when Dooce has constipation which is all the time. So not only were we waiting for the people in front of us to finish but the group behind us was waiting too.

Of course the carts behind us had to include the President of the company, who also loves Alex more then me, and of course he had to be watching when I got up to the tee and missed the ball about 10 times before I finally was able to hit the ball about 10 feet in front of me. Of course Alex helped by saying,


"You know Bob is watching you don't you? You better not mess up!" (not his real name by the way)


So embarrassing! I was surprised Bob (not his real name) didn't fire me right there on the spot. But then again, Alex was there so I was safe.



So you see, I love my job and I love the people I work with, but not as much as they love Alex.


Alex, Alex, Alex!


That's all I ever hear!

37 comments:

brokenteepee said...

Just remember HE had the good sense to marry YOU.

Michelle said...

How funny that they adore him so much! But hey, if it works out in your favor, what's the big deal, right? Kudos to you for being willing to go golf in front of everyone you work with though. I am also a terrible golfer and wouldn't be caught dead showing my (lack of) skills on the green!!

Kristina P. said...

Aren't husbands great?

Liz Mays said...

You need to get over to his place of employment and start canoodling. TODAY!

And that last picture of the two of you needs to be framed.

Andrea Harper said...

Dude, my HUSBAND likes Al more than he likes me.

I know how you feel.

Ok, not really. I am, after all, the one who gives him 'special favors'....

At least Al can never beat me at that! So HA! YEAH!!! In yo F'in FACE! (that's SO a family guy line from Brian. What have I become???)

Rebecca Jo said...

Hey - my husband is extreme to the opposite way... he would NEVER come around work or work functions... I know they thought I was like Jane Brady myself in the episode where she MADE UP her boyfriend!!! They probably thought my husband was a phantom or something!

That's OK cause if they knew him, I'd probably LOOSE my job! (Joking honey!)

Lee said...

The one with the penis, classic.
Just ride the train while you can. I mean, it's probably annoying as hell, but at least you're getting somewhere!

thatgirlblogs said...

something tells me you're really good at your job. just be glad you've got Alex in your back pocket. insurance and all...

Stephanie Faris said...

You guys make a beautiful couple.

I resemble this post! My boyfriend is one of those people everyone likes. He works in sales and people bond to him instantly. Even his boss remarks about it. Some of my family members like him better than me! He's just one of those people. It's great...because it takes the pressure off me!

Suzi said...

You know they love you too. If they didn't they would have fired you a long time ago!

Julia said...

Time to get a strap on Pooba!! Then you will be able to play golf. It is a requirement you know. All the LPGA is doing it. That's how they win! Really it's easy.

Very entertaining...

Who in the HELL needs golf anyway. A bunch of pansies walking around on manicured lawns, driving golf carts. Now if they were all real men they'd be playing golf out in those hills behind the club.

But at least you're getting ahead cause of it. Rather LARGE favors I am guessing...

OK slap me I am done and pathetic.

Michelle said...

Can't wait to see your Analytics report after you said penis twice and consipation in the same post.

Megan said...

Last year for the summer event at {my previous place of employment}, we had a golf tournament, too. Kyle golfed, I putt-putted. Not all the guys got Kyle's sense of humor...a lot of people don't. I always feel like I have to tell people that Kyle's kidding or something. lol There were a couple guys that got along with Kyle though, which I was very thankful for!

But hey, for you, if Al's golfing gets your promotions, tell him to keep doing what he's doing!

LadyStyx said...

Never had that problem. With the first husband, no one seemed to like him. Didn't matter which one's job we were at. This husband, well, I don't work so there's no who likes whom best. Although I do win them all over around Christmas when I decide to bake cookies!

thatgirlblogs said...

thanks for visiting my blog today. I needed that support ;)

Karin Katherine said...

You may not be a great golfer...but you LOOK like a great golfer. That's all that matters. Work the golf wear and um...stand by Alex!

Ms. Wanda said...

You captured Jane so well in your story! You guys look so terrific, wow how handsome is that Alex:) Listen I pimp my husband as often as I can:) (just kidding)

Have a great weekend:)
xoxox
Ms. Wanda

ChicagoLady said...

I'd ask if Alex swings his hair when he walks, but it wouldn't be his hair swinging. (Did I just say that outloud?)

Julie H said...

I've never golfed. I'm pretty sure I'd suck though.

Your man has some AWESOME shoulders. hubba hubba ;O)

Nana said...

Let's see if I get this right. You have your job because of your husband's penis. Hmmmmmmm.

y u l z said...

The picture of you both looks great, and who's husband is that ? hehehe I'm sure your company knows that perfectly

Mindy, Tyler, and Kids said...

I'm the same way with golf. I want to be good but it never works out that way. I guess it's a bonus you get to sleep with your husband and not your boss to get promotions! ;)

scrappysue said...

great post. i love my job too and i HATE golf.

scrappysue said...

did you love district 9? i found it compelling and riveting and i NEVER say that about a movie!

Hit 40 said...

Your an adorable couple!! Too cute.

How awesome that your husband hangs out with your coworkers. As a math teacher, I have some strange co workers. Hard to bond with! Kinda like Monk from USA network. We have tried to bond with them. Just NOT happening.

Your story made me want to go hit a bucket today and soak in some sun.

Xazmin said...

Don't feel bad. My family told my husband if we ever get in a fight, HE is welcome to come home and sleep there.

JennyMac said...

HAHAHA..

Hi Alex...who is your friend. You had me laughing out loud.

I have something for you on my blog.

Anonymous said...

Ha! Yup I know exactly what you mean. Josh is a huge charmer. Only with me I work with kids and the kids are always like 'we want Josh' and I'm like yeah bc he gets to swoop in and be fun-nice guy while I'm stuck being rule enforcer. Men...

Justine said...

Hey, if his charm is getting you promotions, let him keep golfing with them and charming the pants off them!

My question to you is, why the hell were you golfing in AUGUST with a sweatshirt on???

Justine :o )

LCO's said...

Hmmmmmmmm, they must not know him very well... jk I love alex to when he isn't making fun of me.

Unknown said...

I agree with what Priscilla said! Think of it as job security. Very cute post and you and Alex are just too sticky sweet!

Jon and Steph said...

Left you something on my blog!

The Wife O Riley said...

That's OK, we love you almost as much as we love Alex. :)

Paging Doctor Mommy said...

At least you are talking about your job in this scenario. I swear my own PARENTS would choose my husband over me!

Stacy Uncorked said...

Alex is definitely a keeper... ;)

That last picture of the two of you needs to be blown up and framed...it's perfection!

Queenie Jeannie said...

Sorry, no sale. You love that man of yours silly!!!!

Alexis AKA MOM said...

Ohhh poor Marsha! LOL that cracks me up girl! Alex rocks it's good you can admit it ... just playing! Too funny, how come our husbands are always the fav.