Monday, November 30, 2009

We Are The Epitome Of Perfection When It Comes To Communication In A Relationship. Get Out A Pen, You Need To Take Notes.

Date night conversation between my husband and I in which we discuss what time we should leave for dinner.


Time: 6:45 pm


Place: The bed. Me laying on my stomach holding my head in my hands staring at the hubster. Him laying on his back, one hand behind his head, staring at his iphone.


Me: "Ok, so lets say we leave at 7:00." (Meaning he better be ready to leave at 7 o'clock)


Him: "I'll try but I have to shower."


Me: "Come on, you're a Dude." (Meaning dudes take fast showers and don't require much time get ready because, well, they're dudes.)



Him: (Thinking that when I said "You're a dude" that I meant he didn't need to take a shower. (Ew) Why he thought this I have NO idea because everyone knows it's girls who can go a day without taking a shower, not dudes. Duh.)


Him: "I went tanning" (This reply meant that he really did need to take a shower because he had gone tanning that day and was emitting a very pungent odor similar to rotten eggs and death.)


Me: "What? Why does that matter?" (Having no idea why he mentioned that he went tanning and wondering if he meant that he would have to do something special in the shower because he smelled like rotten eggs and death. Which still doesn't make sense, a shower is a shower.)


Him: Sighing, "Never mind Poob." Starts playing with his iphone.


Me: "No wait, let's recap. I said let's leave at 7:00, you said you need to take a shower, I said you're a dude meaning that you should be able to take a fast shower, you said that you went tanning. Why would you say that? It isn't even relephant!"


(Pausing, realizing I just said relephant instead of relevant.)


Him: "Really Poob?" Raising an eyebrow.


Me: "I just said relephant." Busting up laughing.


Him: "You. Dork."


Me: Tearing up, "I am hilarious. I just made up a new word, I'm the funny one!"


*Side Note: We constantly fight over who the funny one is in the relationship. I always win obviously.


Him: "No, you're not the funny one, notice you're the only one laughing?" Trying not to laugh (or cry) as I start punching him in the man boob.



rel-e-phant [rel-uh-fuh nt]

-adjective
Bearing upon or connected with the matter at hand in a VERY BIG way.


39 comments:

Denise @ Sunflowers, Chocolate and Little Boys said...

Thats cute. But I want to know if you were able to leave at 7?? LOL

Courtney said...

Ha! Ha! I laughed! And everytime you write "poob" I say pube in my head and have to correct myself!

Pricilla said...

Did he stop smelling?
That's what I want to know...

Jen said...

He's wrong. You are the funny one. LOL!

Karin Katherine said...

So funny! I cannot even translate everything with my husband and me because I'm still trying to figure it out.

Bird Shit and Baby Caca said...

I will add that to my dictionary and try to use it in a sentence at least once a day.

Oh My Goddess said...

You are the funny one.

And the smart one.

And the better smelling one.

THE Stephanie said...

Y'all are so silly. And very, very relephant.

blueviolet said...

You are funny. He smells funny.

Suzi said...

Tanning? Really? Not good. And you ARE a funny one, don't let anyone tell you any different!

WhisperingWriter said...

Relephant? I love it!

I say you're the funny one.

Chief said...

heh? love it, will use it. Did you ever make it to dinner?

Frau said...

Too funny....you are funny and creative! You need to let google know you new word or at least webster!

Kristina P. said...

I am DEFINITELY the funny one in the relationship. Well, on purpose anyway.

Alexis AKA MOM said...

I love it I'm adding it to my new vocab words! My luck Cole will use it at school and tell them but mom says it's a real word .... LOL

As for men and showers and getting ready. I swear Rick spends more time then I ever would in there. No clue how he has less hair and doesn't wear make up!

Rebecca said...

Hilarious! That is all.

Mayhem and Moxie said...

Let's get right down to details, Poob. Al is tanning? As in tanning bed tanning?

(just kidding!)

PS: I heart the Tori Amos CD you are listening to. SO good.

kidzorg.blogspot.com said...

You ARE the funny one. No doubt. I love your new word! My husband's the one who makes up words around here.... He is no doubt the funny one in our relationship. I can't keep up with his nonsense!

TMI Tara said...

whoops, that was me.

glitterbygrammie said...

That was funny.

Rebecca Jo said...

I felt like I was sitting right there in the midst of this conversation! :)

And I'm going to find a way to use your new word tomorrow in my day!!!

Yaya said...

Lol!

Stacy (the Random Cool Chick) said...

LOVE this! And I'm SO going to use the word 'relephant' in a sentence this week. Because it will totally be relephant.

I always tell hubby or Princess Nagger they're funny...but that looks aren't everything. ;)

otin said...

Ala Courtney way up there, my mind is in the gutter and Poob becomes pube. I can't help it. I am a perv and will admit it freely!

KK said...

That is too funny!

Yaya said...

Soooo...yeah....I fell asleep realizing that the only thing I wrote in your comment was "Lol". Sorry for the lame comment. And yes, that was what I was strangely thinking about before I fell asleep. Weird, I know.

Anyways,
What I was originally going to say is:
Your husband goes tanning???

Jon and Steph said...

Haha, oh my, you are a dork! Crack me up!

JennyMac said...

HAHAHA...you make me laugh so much.

Poob.

LOL. I am not pronouncing it Pube either.

survivinglifedaily said...

OMG I thought I was the only one who had wierd miscommunications like that!! I like the new word by the way!

Justine said...

ROFLMAO! OMG, you really had this conversation? And what were you DOING, laying in bed at 6:45 at night? Hmmm???

And, did you actually go out to dinner? Not that it's totally relephant...

Justine :o )

Debbi said...

I'll totally use that. With credit to the TRUE FUNNY ONE!!

*funny smelling doesn't count, Al!*

LadyStyx said...

*laffin* Too funny!

kel said...

OMG! I love you! And you are totally the funny one!

African American Mom said...

LOL! Hands down you are the funniest!

Queenie Jeannie said...

OK, so you're a FUNNY dork.


LOL!!!!!!!!!!

Synergy Girl said...

I had the biggest visual image during that whole story that I was so engaged in reading it that I almost forgot how jealous I was that your husband will go tanning...!!! That convo...minus the tanning...I could totally picture happening in our relationship...you crack me up!

CLUFF FAMILY said...

sO funny. I love that. "Stop talking while I am interrupting!"

Megan said...

LMAO!! Love it!

Erica Ortiz said...

That may be the awesomest word of the year. Really.