Monday, December 21, 2009

Nipples, The Perfect Conversation Starter

We're finally back from Hawaii! It always sucks coming home after a vacation, especially coming home from a beautiful 80 degree paradise to a dark and grey 27 degree inversion.

But hello? I came home to my fury babies and all is well!

I've got 526,437 pictures from the trip to post for you but all in good time my friends, all in good time. For now I will leave you with another intelligent conversation I had last night with the hubster.

Me: "Nipples are so weird"

Hubster: "I know they really are huh?"

Me: "Why do guys even have nipples anyway?"

Hubster: "Come on Poob, that'd just be weird. Can you imagine me with no nipples, just extremely huge manly pec muscles?"

Me: Laughing, "I don't think it'd look too bad. I'm glad you don't have those gross saggy kind of nipples, I can't stand those. But seriously, why do guys have nipples? They have no use at all."

Hubster: "Yes they do."

Me: "Oh really, and what is that?"

Hubster: "To pierce."

Me: Laughing, "Oh Al"


Inside Joke:

My husband served an LDS (Mormon) Mission in Boston when he was nineteen. Of course there are so many rules for missionaries such as they can't be alone with girls, they can't even think about girls, they have to wear suits and ties, they have to have their hair short and cannot have any facial hair, the can't go anywhere without their companions, they can't be gay, they can't listen to worldly music, watch TV, or read worldly books, talk on the phone with family except for Holidays, they can't even steal from old ladies, they can't hold seances and worship the devil, they can't perform human sacrifices,

etcetra, etcetra.


But there are a few who like to bend the rules a bit, maybe to show rebellion, maybe to feel normal again, or maybe just for fun, who knows? Well, my husband was one of those and decided his form of rebellion would be...



Wait for it....




Piercing his nipples.




(But you've already figured that out by now haven't you.)


Yes, he got his nipples pierced while on his mission when he was supposed to be serving the Lord. But don't worry, he took his companion with him so he didn't break that rule. The church discourages such piercings and tattoos for all it's members, not just missionaries so this was a big no-no.

He was such a rebel wasn't he?


He said it hurt like hell. He had never experienced pain of that magnitude before in his life. He honestly can't say what hurt worse, getting into his motorcycle accident or getting his nipples pierced. But I don't feel sympathy for his nipple affliction.

It was obviously God's punishment.

37 comments:

Kristina P. said...

Wow. I don't even know what to say. I am just laughing. That is probably the stupidest way to rebel ever. Haha.

What about just sneaking in a Nintendo?

Yaya said...

Ouch! i can't type, I'm too busy guarding my nipples in pain!

otin said...

And why we are at it, why do we have that little patch of hair that just grows wildly in that one region??

Is it really necessary? Don't you think that we could have Darwinned that shit out by now? LOL Welcome back!!

thatgirlblogs said...

so. does he still wear a nipple ring?

Nana said...

I agree. Was he at least reading the Book of Mormon to the piercing dude? Maybe challenging him to a baptism? Setting up an appointment?

Couldn't he have just drank a cup of joe?

My oldest daughter got a huge dragonfly tat on her back and tried to hide it from me. You met Taylor, anyway I saw it at Girl's camp. I just think it's going to look weird when she gets back fat and the wings on that thing start flapping around.

Just like Al's piercings are going to look great when he gets man boobs and they get caught in his belly button.

Lee said...

I will NEVER pierce my nipples.
Way way way too much pain.
There's so many nerves there man.

Is it bad that I just laughed because my word verification was "phargen"?

Kasey Hunt said...

Glad you made it back safely. I couldn't imagine the pain...... ouch!

Stacy (the Random Cool Chick) said...

WooHoo! Welcome back! Can't wait to see the 526,437 pictures! :)

And OUCH! That's kind of a painful way to rebel, don'tcha think?

Pricilla said...

I guess it's better than other things he could have had pierced.

yulz said...

Welcome back Poob ~

Can't wait to see the pics =) and I'm absolutely agreed with Pricilla hahahahahaha

Jason, as himself said...

Shut UP!!! This story makes me feel kinda tingly, for some reason. Hmmm.

He seriously had his nipples pierced while he was on his mission? That boggles my mind. I think that is probably worse than worshipping the devil on your mission. I think.

And can I tell you how much I adore Nana's comment about challenging the piercing guy to a baptism?

I'd like to challenge YOU to post a picture of your husbands pierced nipples.

Grand Pooba said...

Oh I only wish Big Al had kept his nipple rings in so I could document the occasion by shamelessly posting a picture of his pierced darlings online.

And no, it did not leave any scars or marks. Lucky bastard.

(Love you babe! BFFs!)

KK said...

My ex-husband had them...until the day our rottweiler pulled one out. That was the end of that! Ouch! (also God's punishment in my opinion :)

WhisperingWriter said...

OUCH!

I've never understood nipple piercings.

Brian Miller said...

you know, i've wanted to get my nipples pierced for a while...

Jen said...

I don't get it either, why do men have nipples?

Frau said...

OMG that cracks me up you hubby is such a rebel. Welcome home!

Rebecca Jo said...

Just add that to your list of why men have nipples... because if they didnt - what is the only other option to pierce? I'm just saying! ;)... & if you tell me THATS pierced, I'm going to bust!

Janalyn and Rob said...

OK, I've heard loads of missionary rebelling stories, but this is one of the funniest...and most painful! Nipple piercing just never really made sense to me.

Shandal said...

OUCH and EWW! Hope you had a good vaycay!

Hernandez Family said...

Why guys have nipples is a conversation that comes up often. The reason guys have nipples is because in the womb the nipples develop before the sex organs.

I'm glad to hear he doesn't have peirced nipples anymore and that everything healed normally. Peirced nipples just doesn't look right.

survivinglifedaily said...

Welcome back, may you freeze with the rest of us!!

Never really though of nipple piercing as the point of men having nipples...defintely and interesting argument!

Tremayne and Dellany Higby said...

Haha, I didn't know the hubs went on a mish. That is funny. Why would he go straight for the nipps??? Crazy bastard!

Kristin said...

Oh dude. OWWWWW! Fun fact. The hub has a third nipple. We call him Pedro. Ah ha ha

Rebecca said...

Welcome back - can't wait to see the pictures.

And all I have to say about nipple piercing is - OUCH!

Justine said...

The question is: Does he still have the piercings? Because if he does, I must see!!!!!!

And hey, I actually know what an inversion is. I think. It's when your clouds are really frickin' low, right? And you can't light a fire in the fireplace?

God I'm worldly.

Justine :o )

angie said...

He pierced his nipples on his mission "irregardless" of the rules?

We lived in Worcester for 3 years......that's one COLD mission. :)

Queenie Jeannie said...

...or read worldly books, talk on the phone with family except for Holidays, they can't even steal from old ladies, they can't hold seances and worship the devil, they can't perform human sacrifices,...

LOL! Oh Poob! I LOVE YOU!!



But still crazy, mad jealous!

Alexis AKA MOM said...

LOL God does have a funny sense of humor.

too funny I don't think I've ever heard of anyone doing such a thing on a mission, but then again I'm sure it would be hush.

Oh Al yup no sympathy here either ... LOL

Santa Claus said...

Ho Ho Ho!! Merry Christmas!! From me and my buddy Otin!

You really are grand, Pooba!

survivinglifedaily said...

Merry Christms to you and yours Pooba!!

Lori said...

Merry Christmas♥ :)

Chief said...

dumbass

Megan said...

Ohmygosh!! Hahahaha!! Totally wouldn't have pictured him as one to have that sort of piercing. lol

Mom Taxi Julie said...

So are they still pierced? I find that sexy for some reason. Shhh don't tell anyone!!

kanishk said...

Is it really necessary? Don't you think that we could have Darwinned that shit out by now? LOL Welcome back!!

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