Don't Act Like You're Not Impressed

Anyone remember this conversation I had with Al a couple years ago?

You know, the one where I made up a new word:

rel-e-phant [rel-uh-fuh nt]

-adjective
Bearing upon or connected with the matter at hand in a VERY BIG way.

Well, aparantly my new word has caught on, I came across this shirt the other day and decided it is a must have:






Yeah, I'm kind of a big deal.


Don't act like you're not impressed.

Little Red Riding Slut

So my last minute costume for Halloween is going to be Little Red Riding Hood. This is the first time in 10 years that I've dressed up for Halloween and I'm way excited. When I saw this costume I knew I just had to have it. It is perfect don't ya think?





I mean, it is exactly what Little Red Riding Hood looked like in the story books. Isn't that awesome!!!


Yeah, I'm going to a Halloween party tomorrow night in Park City, well it's a "house crawl" party which is like a bar crawl except you go from house to house instead of bar to bar. So it's a good thing my costume has a hood to keep my head warm when walking outside!


Yeah if you can't tell, I'm pretty stoked.


Okay, seriously guys, you really think I would wear that? Yeah, you're right, I totally would. Shopping for a girl's Halloween costume is a joke! Everything is slutty this and slutty that. Trying to find a costume that didn't show my ass was quite the challenge. The most non-slutty costume I found was the Little Red Riding Hood costume. Not the one above, mine looks like this:





Except I have a severed wolf head to put in my basket! And of course I have my red Mary Jane's, a wig and false eyelashes. I'm thinking about splattering the costume with blood, you know because I just chopped the wolf's head off. I want to be a scary Little Red Riding Hood, I don't know, what do you think?


What are YOU going to be for Halloween?

Fashion Forward . . . . And Back

Just realized that my shirt, shoes AND my underwear all match.  That's right,


I. Am. Awesome.


If you're looking for any fashion tips or just wondering "How does she do it?"  just let me know, I'll share all my secrets with you.  Here are just a few:

• Stay out until 2 AM the night before
• Wake up 15 minutes before work
• Run into the bed post 2 1/2 times
• Trip over the cat on your way out of the shower
• Get dressed in the dark

If you follow these simple steps then maybe, just maybe, you can be as fashionable as me.


Maybe.

My Pouchee

No, I don't mean pouchee as in the belly fat hanging over my pants. This is something completely different, and a lot more fun to talk about (and look at).


Okay everyone, your house isn't the only thing that needs Spring cleaning. I dare all of you out there to take a look into your purse, I bet there's a million receipts, makeup, cadburry eggs, and keys. Okay maybe the Cadburry egg is just me, but just admit it, your purse is unorganized.


I'm ashamed to say that mine was too so I did a little purse Spring cleaning with my new best friend,


The Pouchee!





Okay, check this out, the pouchee is a purse organizer where you can keep all of your purse necessities neatly organized so you can always find what you're looking for. Plus, when the mood strikes you to change your purse, the pouchee transfers easily from purse to purse.


I chose the Evening Plum Outback Pouchee, isn't it purdy?





Check out all the crap you can fit nicely into the cute little pouchee. It has a spot for everything! Plus pouchee is just really fun to say.







I could even fit a couple cadburry eggs in there too because you'll never know when you'll need a cadburry egg.


You want pouchee? Well you can havee!


Pouchee is offering their first online discount coupon that gives you 10% off your entire order, you know, because you'll probably have to buy 10 of these to share with your friends. So here is the secret code to get your savings:


poucheemom


So go check them out, they come in all sorts of colors and materials to fit any one's style.


Pouchee Purse Organizer


They even have pouchees for the consoles in your car and the pouchee plus! You can also find them on facebook where they keep you up to date on new deals and giveaways.














The nice peeps at Pouchee gave me my very own Pouchee to try out. I didn't recieve any other form of compensation and this post is based on my own opinion.

Me heart pouchee peeps.

Native Honey: Helping You to NOT Suck

Ok, I have some fabulous news.



Remember when I was bragging about this bag?







And how cool I am because I own it and how everyone else who doesn't have one pretty much sucks?










Well, now YOU have a chance to not suck!



Janae, co-founder of Native Honey, is having a giveaway over on her blog, Pink Moss!







You've got until 9 pm Eastern on Monday, March 8th to enter. This is her very first giveaway so your chances of winning are VERY good. She is also planning to give away one Native Honey bag each month so if you don't win this time, make sure you go back next month!



Go HERE to enter.



And thank God for Native Honey, helping women and children all around the world to NOT suck.

My Closet Has A Muffin Top

Watch out Salt Lake City, the streets are going to become one fashion disaster after another.


I donated all my clothes to the homeless.


I've never prided myself in my fashion sense, in fact I consider myself quite the opposite of fashion savvy so get out your cameras this is going to be a sight to see.


Me and the homeless go way back so I'm sure I'll run into someone wearing my outfit asking me for change and I'll have to apologize to them right away.


"I. AM. SO. SORRY. The fashion God's totally gypped me when bestowing their blessings, I know not what I do. But at least you're warm right?"


So this is my official apology and warning to all the people, dogs, and cats of Salt Lake City. You have been warned.




It was a big weekend for me. It was about time that I downsized our closets, they were bustin at the seams, sportin a muffin top and everything. I was so stoked to organize all of our clothes, a threw out any pack rat essence left in me and totally purged the closets.






Total Weight loss? 200,450.25 pounds. (Or somewhere close to that)



This is just the first stage in project closet organization. My goal was to get rid of all my old shit (because that's exactly what it was) that I don't wear anymore, get dividers for my dresser drawers, and rid my life of wire hangers.




(I am so in love with my new hangers)


A place for everything and everything in it's place.


I had to physically restrain myself from making a list of every single item we owned and categorizing and cross referencing them into files so that I would have documentation of every item we sent to the homeless shelter, every item we sent to the D.I., and every item we kept.



It was rough.



I did however categorized the bags so that I knew which ones went where.






Dozer was more than skeptical.






Ok, now for the before and after.


This is my closet before step one of Project Closet Organization. Remember step one is just focusing on the clothes so please ignore the junk on the shelves, those will come later.





Notice my cloth shelf barely hanging on for it's dear life? It fell to it's death a few seconds later. It is now resting peacefully in the landfill.


Okay, so here is the after photo:





I love my hangers.





Joan Crawford eat your heart out.







See what a big difference such a little change can make? All I did was get rid of some clothes, moved all my summer clothes to our storage closet and changed hangers.


Did I tell you I love my new hangers?


Oh man, if I wasn't married...*starting to day dream about marrying my hangers*....Well, now that I think of it, if Utah won't even let my gays get married, I doubt they'd allow me to marry my hangers, and I'm pretty sure polyandry is illegal anyway.


Wow. Am I seriously talking about marrying my hangers?


Ok moving on...


Now for Albert's closet. Sorry I didn't get a before picture of Al's closet, but it was CA-RAMMED!


But not anymore!






If you're not salivating right now, there is something seriously wrong with you.


Now as much as I WANTED to take a picture of my underwear drawer and post it on the internet, I thought maybe, just maybe, that wouldn't be the brightest of ideas so I'll just show you an example of what it looks like:




*applause* (Because I know you're all applauding right now)


*taking a bow while the crowd goes wild*


"I'd like to thank my mentor, Karin Katherine, for inspiration and resources, I'd like to thank my husband for letting me empty our wallets on "just silly" hangers, I'd like to thank Real Simple for their brilliant closet organization products, and last but not least I'd like to thank Gin & Tonic for the lovely celebration party."

Jealousy Is As Sweet As Native Honey

I guarantee you will be jealous by the time you finish reading this post.


Looky what I got!





Oh yeah, you remember when I told you about Native Honey? Well yesterday I got an original Native Honey purse of my very own! I don't mean to rub it in your face but look how cute it is?





You want one don't you?


Well Native Honey now has a kiosk open at the Fashion Place Mall in Murray Utah where you get to physically pick out your favorite handbag in person. And of course now is the perfect time to buy two (one for you and the second for me) because they are going on sale!


Starting Thanksgiving night all purses will be going on sale to 20% off WHOLESALE PRICES.


No joke. I wouldn't joke about this. The 20% sale goes from Thursday 11/25 through Sunday 11/29 and after that the handbags will be sold at WHOLESALE PRICES through Christmas!


So go check out their kiosk now before they are all gone. There is a cute girl there who is happy to help you choose the best one for you. And if you're like me (the most indecisive person in the world) you can do what I did and make her decide for you.


And of course I'm happy with "my" choice!



Ok so I realize not everyone lives in Utah. (I know, I bout died when I found out too) So if you are outside of Utah and really want one I'd be happy to go pick it up for you. And that is a big favor because it means I'll have to STEP. FOOT. INTO. A. SHOPPING. ESTABLISHMENT.


Yeah, they're that spectacular.



              The Candor:                      The Tumbleweed Canvas:










              The Original:                    The Tumbleweed Leather:









The pictures do not do them justice. I mean these purses are not kidding people, they are so well made the quality is impeccable. I wish I could hand it to you through the screen so you can see for yourself. (And to actually rub it into your face.)


I could go on and on about my new purse but I'll spare you my squealing.


Jealous?


Cure: A Native Honey Handbag!




Just sayin.

A Before & After and "Someone Please Come Dress Me!"

I love before and after pictures so I just have to post some of my Dad's house. He's been remodeling for a couple months and it looks great, I am so freakin jealous. I want his house. Now.


All of these pictures were taken during parties that we were having at his house so pay no attention to the folding chairs, table cloths, food and people. They are NOT part of the remodel. Starting with the biggest upgrade, the kitchen:


Before:



After:



Additions: New chrome appliances, marble counter top, tiled walls and new lighting.



Dining Room before:



After:


Additions: New light, marble window ledges



The family room Before:



After:


Additions: Marble mantel top, marble window ledges, new couch, and new decor.


The living room before:



After:




Additions: Marble window ledges, lighting, window treatments, my sisters piano, and well, everything else.



The next pics are of his bedroom. I don't have a before picture because well, there was basically nothing in here before. So here are the after pics:



Additions: Um, everything.



Now if I could only finish cleaning out my closet so I can post some before and after pictures of that. Oh, and I need someone to come remodel me too. You should have seen what I wore to work yesterday.

Pink short sleeve v-neck sweater similar to this (except with short sleeves):



With a white tank underneath similar to this (you don't want any cleave showin at work, unless you're up for a promotion in which case no tank is required):



Charcoal pants, these exact ones:



With these black shiny boots:



Nothing matched, it was seriously like a 4 year old dressed me. There was something about the white tank and the black shoes that threw the whole outfit off. I got home from work and blamed Albert, he should know better than to let me out of the house in that.


Go ahead, you can call the fashion police, I'll even dial the phone number for you.


I seriously need someone to dress me in the morning.


I need help.